An ACE-RWD Inter-Promotional Vignette Starring MS + JBC!
Jan 5, 2015 7:35:29 GMT
asigmaphi likes this
Post by wwjbcd on Jan 5, 2015 7:35:29 GMT
“You know what I’m gonna say before I even say it, DON’T you, ladies and gents? Oh yeah, ya do!”
Then, the scene goes from black to real life, which I understand is not a colour, but I honestly have no way to describe that otherwise. I’m just not very good at this.
Johnny Bonecrusher, in recent months taking on the moniker of The #1 Hit-Maker, adding onto his neverending list of nicknames, stands next to a mountain of a man raising an interestingly-adorned VERY unofficial title belt with a hardcore motif. He holds it above his head as if it were the Holy Grail, the 10 Commandments, the last Furby of the late ‘90’s, or whenever the Hell that fucky fad was going on, who cares?
“2014 was an interesting year, wrestling fans. Chock-full of ups and downs, milestones and disappointments, all SORTSA good shit!”
Johnny frowns a bit, though. “And all sortsa BAD shit, too. Wrestling fans, The Johnny ain’t gonna lie to ya: the butt-end of 2014 lived up to its name - it really WAS a BUTT END. But hey, that’s alright, that’s okay, that’s like SO last year! SO last year. I ain’t EVEN about dwelling on the past when there’s this big-ass new-ass year standing right in front of us, all ripe for the picking. This fresh, unpaved frontier known as 2015. And who BETTER to pave the way to a better year for professional wrestling than The Fold? Kruzer, Jezzabel, this wacky nutty guy behind me, and Yours Truly! And who’s to say it’s gotta stop THERE? 2015 could see the inducting of many MORE fledglings into our motley crew!”
“Heeeee’s the one they call Dr. FEELGOOD!!! Heeeee’s the one that makes ya feel ALRIGHT!!! Heeeee’s the one they call Dr. FEELGOOD!!! HE’S GONNA BE YOUR FRANKENSTEIN!!!”
Schneider says, basically shouting that last line into Johnny’s ear. Johnny meanwhile looks like he’s just suffering from a nervous tick.
Clearing the offended ear with a finger, he shakes his head and suck in air through mostly closed teeth. “Not… THAT… Mötley Crüe, of course… NEVER that Mötley Crüe. Anyway, where was I… God dammit, Maxwell, you made me lose my train of thought!”
“So what you’re saying is,” Schneider responds, “You missed your train?HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAA!!!!!!!!!!”
“You know better than that.” Johnny scolded matter-of-factly. “But let’s DO talk about you for a second. Maxwell, you ready to bring your A-game into 2015?”
Schneider grins confidently, “A-positive or negative, boss?”
Johnny grins and nods in approval, “That’s good! That’s good. Blood references. That’s the right attitude to have! But now let me ask YOU this: WHO, Maxwell, WHO is the Master of Mayhem?”
Schneider cloyingly rolls his eyes upwards, “I am!”
“Who’s the Virtuoso of Violence?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Sultan of Slam?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Impresario of Impact?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Don Mega of Mean?”
“ME!”
“And who’s the Baron of the Brass Knuckles?”
“Oh, BABY if that ain’t me!”
Johnny holds up his hands in an almost-shrug and looks into the camera as if saying “See?”
“We had our fun at Christmastime, but now it’s 2015, and it’s, no, no, it’s NOT the Year of the Sheep; we TOLD you, it’s the Year of the FOLD! And now with the Brass Knuckles Championship, rest ASSURED that my man Schneider’s gonna do some FOLDING... and I don’t MEAN no shirts and pants! Kruzer and Jezzabel, The Johnny ain’t sweatin’ no Canadian Icons and Living Dead Girls: their success is in the BAG! The RWD’s Power Couple are gonna show these YAHOOS what happens when you marginalize REAL-ass talent. Real knows real, and if you don’t see that, then guess what? You’re probably imaginary. I’m livin’ in the REAL world, doing this crazy shit for REAL fans, promising the kicking of REAL asses, and makin’ those VERY real dolla dolla bills, y’all!”
Johnny rubs his fingers together, pantomiming the feeling of those sweet sweet paper money bills in one’s hand, and Schneider emulates his manager from behind.
“And with this mindset, you’d best BELIEVE that The Fold’s gonna run roughshod over the competition this year… or die TRYING, JACK!”
Schneider looks excited at the prospect of dying, or so it seems. Maybe just death in general? Maybe just morbid things flowing through his brain, warped by his unique perspective on the world as a whole. Or I’m just talking a lot of crazy bullshit.
Either way, we’re done here.
“Let ME…
Make ONE thing…
PERFECTLY CLEAR!”
Then, the scene goes from black to real life, which I understand is not a colour, but I honestly have no way to describe that otherwise. I’m just not very good at this.
Johnny Bonecrusher, in recent months taking on the moniker of The #1 Hit-Maker, adding onto his neverending list of nicknames, stands next to a mountain of a man raising an interestingly-adorned VERY unofficial title belt with a hardcore motif. He holds it above his head as if it were the Holy Grail, the 10 Commandments, the last Furby of the late ‘90’s, or whenever the Hell that fucky fad was going on, who cares?
“2014 was an interesting year, wrestling fans. Chock-full of ups and downs, milestones and disappointments, all SORTSA good shit!”
Johnny frowns a bit, though. “And all sortsa BAD shit, too. Wrestling fans, The Johnny ain’t gonna lie to ya: the butt-end of 2014 lived up to its name - it really WAS a BUTT END. But hey, that’s alright, that’s okay, that’s like SO last year! SO last year. I ain’t EVEN about dwelling on the past when there’s this big-ass new-ass year standing right in front of us, all ripe for the picking. This fresh, unpaved frontier known as 2015. And who BETTER to pave the way to a better year for professional wrestling than The Fold? Kruzer, Jezzabel, this wacky nutty guy behind me, and Yours Truly! And who’s to say it’s gotta stop THERE? 2015 could see the inducting of many MORE fledglings into our motley crew!”
“Heeeee’s the one they call Dr. FEELGOOD!!! Heeeee’s the one that makes ya feel ALRIGHT!!! Heeeee’s the one they call Dr. FEELGOOD!!! HE’S GONNA BE YOUR FRANKENSTEIN!!!”
Schneider says, basically shouting that last line into Johnny’s ear. Johnny meanwhile looks like he’s just suffering from a nervous tick.
Clearing the offended ear with a finger, he shakes his head and suck in air through mostly closed teeth. “Not… THAT… Mötley Crüe, of course… NEVER that Mötley Crüe. Anyway, where was I… God dammit, Maxwell, you made me lose my train of thought!”
“So what you’re saying is,” Schneider responds, “You missed your train?HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAA!!!!!!!!!!”
“You know better than that.” Johnny scolded matter-of-factly. “But let’s DO talk about you for a second. Maxwell, you ready to bring your A-game into 2015?”
Schneider grins confidently, “A-positive or negative, boss?”
Johnny grins and nods in approval, “That’s good! That’s good. Blood references. That’s the right attitude to have! But now let me ask YOU this: WHO, Maxwell, WHO is the Master of Mayhem?”
Schneider cloyingly rolls his eyes upwards, “I am!”
“Who’s the Virtuoso of Violence?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Sultan of Slam?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Impresario of Impact?”
“ME!”
“Who’s the Don Mega of Mean?”
“ME!”
“And who’s the Baron of the Brass Knuckles?”
“Oh, BABY if that ain’t me!”
Johnny holds up his hands in an almost-shrug and looks into the camera as if saying “See?”
“We had our fun at Christmastime, but now it’s 2015, and it’s, no, no, it’s NOT the Year of the Sheep; we TOLD you, it’s the Year of the FOLD! And now with the Brass Knuckles Championship, rest ASSURED that my man Schneider’s gonna do some FOLDING... and I don’t MEAN no shirts and pants! Kruzer and Jezzabel, The Johnny ain’t sweatin’ no Canadian Icons and Living Dead Girls: their success is in the BAG! The RWD’s Power Couple are gonna show these YAHOOS what happens when you marginalize REAL-ass talent. Real knows real, and if you don’t see that, then guess what? You’re probably imaginary. I’m livin’ in the REAL world, doing this crazy shit for REAL fans, promising the kicking of REAL asses, and makin’ those VERY real dolla dolla bills, y’all!”
Johnny rubs his fingers together, pantomiming the feeling of those sweet sweet paper money bills in one’s hand, and Schneider emulates his manager from behind.
“And with this mindset, you’d best BELIEVE that The Fold’s gonna run roughshod over the competition this year… or die TRYING, JACK!”
Schneider looks excited at the prospect of dying, or so it seems. Maybe just death in general? Maybe just morbid things flowing through his brain, warped by his unique perspective on the world as a whole. Or I’m just talking a lot of crazy bullshit.
Either way, we’re done here.
THE END.
so quickly so sad!
