From The Ashes DVD Special - Kaiser vs. Martinez

Alternate Commentary - FTA Main Event

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Heyyy, sports fans, it's your favourite instigator here, The #1 Hit-Maker Johnny Bonecrusher. Now before we start, I'd like to give you some back story on the following match, which is Con-a Martinez versus Fartemis Kaiser. I'd LIKE to give you some back story on this, but The Johnny just don't GIVE a fuck!")

After the last match, the crowd begins to die down. They are anticipating what was coming next. The main event of this evening. The supposed end of Shawna Martinez and Artemis Kaiser’s heated rivalry. People rush out to go to the bathroom. Others go to buy their food and merchandise. The camera catches a nice shot of a sign that reads “There Will Be Blood”. The camera pans over to the commentary table. West Newhaven and Matt Baily are serious, despite their earlier banter.

Matt Baily - “Up next, we have our main event. The vacant RWD Women’s Championship is up for grabs in one of the most anticipated, if not most anticipated match of the night. Shawna Martinez takes on Artemis Kaiser in a thirty minute Ironwoman match. Folks, I must tell you that this will not be pretty. These two women are some of the best wrestlers today. They will hold no punches. They will spare no mercy for one another. They will quite literally beat each other to a bloody pulp.”

West Newhaven: “As much as I hope our lovely Artemis Kaiser beats the crap out of that degenerate, Shawna Martinez, we all know that Shawna will put up a fight. No one is going to be walking out of this match the same. Hell…that is if they can even walk out!”

Matt Baily - “You got that right, West.”

“Living Dead Girl” by Rob Zombie hits as Johnny Bonecrusher comes out, followed by Jezzabel. The crowd gives her the respect that she deserves, humming along with the melodic beats of the song. Jezzabel does not seem to care as she follows her manager. Johnny, however, is presenting his client.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Now that is one handsome man.")

They both walk around the ring towards the commentary.

Matt Baily - “As announced, Johnny Bonecrusher and his client, Jezzabel, the undefeated ‘Living Dead Girl’, will be watching this match. Jezzabel seems to be in the lineup to be our number one contender for the Women’s Championship.”

Newhaven: “As I stated before, be afraid, be very afraid. This woman is dominance personified. She not only man-handled Lucy Wylde, but she rid of that bubbly doofus, Marie Porter. But I like to think that Artemis broke her down and Jezzabel cleaned up the scraps.”

Matt Baily - “Whatever, West. Anyways, she will be watching closely while we have Johnny Bonecrusher here on commentary with us. Welcome to the table, Johnny!”

A ring bell is heard as the camera focuses on Brenden Reynalds.

Brenden Reynalds – “The following contest is your main event of the evening! And it is a 30 minute Ironwoman match for the RWD Women’s Championship! There will be no disqualifications, no count outs. The only way to acquire points is to pin your opponent or make her submit. At the end of the thirty minutes, the wrestler with the most decisions will win!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Oh, is THAT how it works? Thanks, tips.")

As Brenden begins to make his way out of the ring, the lights suddenly go out. The crowd already begins to ramp up, knowing the woman about to make her entrance. Over time, a chant begins to form, getting progressively louder.

“SHAWNA, SHAWNA, SHAWNA!”

Then the first notes of “Animals” by Martin Garixx fills the arena. The arena of 1500 strong are on their feet as the infamous red spotlight shines on the entrance way. Shawna lets the crowd flare up, taking about a minute to even come out. When she comes out, the crowd continues their chant.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Here comes Brokeneck Mountain, folks!")

She gives them a once over, smiling widely as she does. She continues soaking in the support as she begins to make her way down the ramp.

West Newhaven - “So Jezzabel—“

Johnny Bonecrusher makes an erratic noise to cut off Newhaven.

Johnny Bonecrusher - “Excuse you, Jezzabel isn’t the one you direct your questions to. My client is going to be too focused on her next victim. And you all know why I'm out here. They're gonna add my commentary on for the DVD extra, so sit down and let me work.”

Shawna is halfway down the ramp. She slaps some of the hands of her devoted fans. She even stops to a young girl who is wearing a piece of her merchandise. She leans down to her, whispering to her.

Shawna Martinez - “Don’t worry, sweet girl. I will slay the dragon for you.”

The girl gives Shawna a smile and hug before Shawna continues on her way down the ramp.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “She's as phony as a three dollar note! I guess that's at least better than her seven dollar note husband!")

She stops in front of the ring, analyzing it. She grins again, before posing. The crowd ramps up again at her pose. With a war cry, she gets into the ring. She takes her seat on the turnbuckle, posing again and hyping the crowd up. With her final signature pose, Shawna slides backward off the turnbuckle. She stays in her corner as she awaits her opponent. Her face immediately lost the gleefulness that she bore on the way down to the ring.

West Newhaven - “I like it, Baily! Shawna is already in the zone. She acted all loving when she was on her way down, but right when her music cut, she flipped the switch. She is ready to throw down!”

The sounds of thunder signaled that it was time. The audience made a complete 180 to the sounds of “Our Truth” by Lacuna Coil picking up. The lights would flash every few seconds, resembling a lightning storm. First enters a man carrying the Canadian flag. He holds it out loud and proud. Behind him appears a man who is holding the Paragon BJJ flag as proudly. But new to the lineup, a man enters holding up a black flag. It is simple. Etched in bold, robust lettering says “KAISER”. The crowd boos at the mere sighting of the name.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Is this an inter-height match? And who are THESE jabronis?")

The three split as Artemis makes her way from the curtain. She is wearing a black hoodie with the Paragon BJJ logo plastered on it. She keeps her head down as she gears herself up mentally for this match.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “There's one too many 'J's' on that hoodie!")

Artemis lets out a furious roar and begins to make her way down to the ring. As her head rises, everyone gets a clear look at the war paint. Two lines of black face paint are underneath her face.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Oh snap! Check out THIS badass!")

She continues her way down the ramp, stretching and punching the air. She doesn’t bother to acknowledge the fans around her like she usually would. Her eyes remained cold and focused on Shawna Martinez. Shawna keeps the same glare that she had on Artemis. They are both in their own world.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “This is it, folks, the war to settle the score! Once it's all over, maybe we can FINALLY stop hearing from these two! Well, except we WON'T, because ONE of them's gonna win, only to have to be fed to The Living Dead Girl!")

West Newhaven - “Our former champion is looking fierce! She is sporting war paint and everything. She has even ditched her “Champion for Life” moniker! I am shocked by the degree that our former and future champion has prepared herself for this match. I won’t go back on what I said earlier about how intense and violent this match will be, but Artemis might bring more to the table than ever before.”

Matt Baily - “Shawna has to, also, West. Shawna has prepared herself since day one of being cleared. She has proclaimed that she has wanted to end Artemis Kaiser. She wants to break her. This woman is on a mission. A mission of destruction. Artemis has to bring the pain here tonight. If she slips up, that might be the end of her. Artemis has stated that she has thirty minutes to torment and abuse Shawna, but one fatal blow…it would be over before the time limit is up.”

West Newhaven - “I don’t doubt either woman. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. And both of these women have been scorned by one another, if I say so myself.”

Artemis climbs the turnbuckle opposite of Shawna, glaring down at her. She takes off her hoodie and gives to one of the officials. The two enemies lock eyes for a good moment as Our Truth fades out. Artemis leaps off the turnbuckle. Shawna begins to step forward and Artemis follows suit. The referee takes hold of the RWD Women’s Championship belt. Both women break their eternal glare to look upon their possible prize. Brendan Reynalds gets back into the ring to make the opening call.

Brenden Reynalds – “Introducing first, from San Jose, California, weighing in at 140 pounds, she is ‘The Impassable” Shawna Martinez!”

The crowd cheers heavily as Shawna is announced. Shawna does not reply to them, but points to herself. She begins to speak out to Artemis who simply cracks her neck.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “She's as arrogant as everyone ELSE in her little clique there! Don't be fooled! BOO her! BOO! BOOOOO!!!")

Brenden Reynalds – “Introducing her opponent, from Mount Pearl, Newfoundland, Canada, weighing in at 123 pounds…she is the former RWD Women’s Champion…’The Young Empress’ Artemis Kaiser!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Fun fact about li'l Art-Art: her actual weight is 123 OUNCES. HA!!!")

The crowd switches immediately to a cascade of boos as Artemis continues her pre-match stretches. Brendan Reynalds makes his way out of the ring. Baskin Robbins, our referee for tonight, raises the RWD Women’s Championship in the air.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Jesus! Is everyone being paid by the HOUR? Hurry it up!")

When he goes off to handle it off, Artemis promptly puts her fist out towards Shawna. Shawna smiles at Artemis’ gesture, stretching a bit herself. Robbins makes it back to the center of the ring. He indicates to both that he is about to start the match.

Robbins - “Are you ready?”

He mentions to Shawna who nods and mouths “More than I’ll ever be.” Robbins then mentions to Artemis.

Robbins - “Are you ready?”

Artemis brings down her fist and gives a nod. Robbins nods back and calls for the start of the match.

West Newhaven - “HERE WE GO!”

West is correct as both women rush out of the gate, immediately going for strikes. Punches upon punches land flush as the two seem ready to tear each other apart. The crowd immediately gets behind them, fired up at the spectacle.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “What maneuvers from both women! The level of skill displayed here can ONLY be found on the walls of caveman homes!")

They keep punching at each other, until Artemis goes for a knee. Shawna doubles over from the sudden switch, allowing Artemis to take control. Artemis continues with the knees to Shawna’s midsection. Shawna blocks one and shoves Artemis off. Artemis comes back quickly with more punches to her rising opponent.

West Newhaven - “They’re like wild animals, Matt. They have not stopped brawling since the bell rung! I love it!”

Matt Baily - “You’re right about that. All of the animosity, all of the preparation, all of the emotions are exploding right here in front of us! OOOOO!”

Artemis decides to run off the ropes, trying to hit an early Falcon Kick, but Shawna grabs her leg. Artemis bounces off of her one leg and goes for an Enziguri. Shawna ducks quickly, collecting Artemis’ other leg. Artemis holds herself up on her hands. She goes inward, pulling Shawna down into a Victory Roll pin. Robbins falls to the mat.



Shawna rolls over, countering the pin into a pin of her own.



Artemis counters the pin, keeping the chain alive and in her favor.



(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Why not go for ANOTHER pin, it worked so good the FIRST forty times!")

Shawna decides to power out of the pin, forcing Artemis off of her. Artemis rolls to her feet, charges back in with more strikes. She opens up her to her striking arsenal with kicks, knees, and elbows. Shawna blocks many, but allows a few in. She catches on Artemis’ punches and fires back with a powerful punch, bringing Artemis to the ground. The crowd cheers in response. She drops down for a pin.



Shawna takes full control as she lifts up Artemis, lowering the pace a little. She pulls her into a quick suplex. Artemis hisses in pain as Shawna stands up. She pulls up Artemis by her hair, giving her some strikes to keep her immobilized. She hits another suplex, getting up again. She drops and cover Artemis.



(Johnny Bonecrusher - “WHEN EVER HAS ANYONE BEEN PINNED FOR THREE AFTER A REGULAR SUPLEX?! MAYBE in the late '70's. MAYBE.")

Shawna gets up, knowing that was not going to be enough to get the first point. She gives the clock a quick glance. 27 minutes and 43 seconds remained.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “It's only been about three minutes! Are you blown up already?")

She nodded as she continued to lay into Artemis.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “See? See? She nodded!")

Matt Baily - “Shawna has taken full control of this match, dropping the pace. If she is smart, she needs to find a way to slow Artemis down. She has the apparent brawn going into this match. She needs to continue to manhandle Artemis and keep her momentum down.”

West Newhaven - “I know that both of these warriors have battle plans, but this is only the calm before the storm. We know that it just takes one move to get them both riled up again. That opening brawl was just the first of---THERE WE GO!”

Shawna lifts Artemis into the air, but as she is holding her up, Artemis pushes her forward. Artemis lands forward onto her feet. As Shawna comes around, Artemis is waiting for her with a back heel kick. The kick lands in Shawna’s gut. Artemis collects her enemy into her arms and picks up. Showing some of her brawn, Artemis plants Shawna down with a heavy Gutwrench suplex. The crowd boos in response as Artemis goes for the pin.



West Newhaven - “Shawna isn’t going down to that, but I think Artemis heard ya, Matt! She is showing off some of her strength.”

Artemis begins to drag Shawna up, but Shawna has something waiting for her. Shawna breaks away from the hold and leaps up, catching Artemis with an explosive dropkick. Artemis flies into the corner. The crowd pops from the sudden move. Shawna rushes into the corner, showing her finesse with a beautiful Handspring splash! Artemis falls to the ground as Shawna’s body collides with her. Shawna pulls Artemis to the center and goes for the pin.



Matt Baily - “Obviously, Shawna heard me as well! That was simply remarkable!”

West Newhaven - “That is why she is one of the best in the business! She might be able to heave you over her head, but she can flip around like a Lucha Libre star! Take notes, people!”

23 minutes and 10 seconds remain in this match. Shawna picks up Artemis and gives her a hard forearm to the face. She then proceeds to rush off the ropes, heading in for a mean clothesline. Artemis ducks and runs off the ropes herself. She tries for another Falcon Kick, but Shawna evades it.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Everyone asks The Johnny, who would I like to see win tonight to go on to face my woman Jezzebel? As much as I'd love to shut Shawna's mouth up once and for all, I DO have a vendetta to settle against Art-Art from back in my Missouri days. It'll be pretty enjoyable to hear Jezzabel slow-motion break all the bones in Art-Art's body!")

Shawna runs off and tries to go for a Yakuza Kick herself. Artemis rolls out the way, running off the ropes. She tries for a devastating Falcon Punch, but Shawna hurls her up in the air. The crowd could not believe what happened. As Shawna hurled Artemis up in the air, Artemis flipped forward.

Matt Baily - “Artemis used the momentum to force herself forward!”

West Newhaven - “And she landed on her feet! What grace!”

Shawna not hearing Artemis’ body hit the canvas turns around. Artemis is waiting for herself and leaps backward, connecting with a Pele Kick to Shawna’s skull. Shawna hits the mat and Artemis follows. The audience rallies up from the momentous occurrence.

“RWD, RWD, RWD!”

West Newhaven - “What a move from our former champion! C’mon, Arty, get over there and pin her!”

Artemis did not heed West’s words. Instead, she got up in the corner. Catching her breath, she awaited Shawna. Once Shawna got up, Artemis struck her best Bruce Lee pose. With a good running start, she leaps into the air.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Midgets can fly!!")

She connects with that lethal side kick of hers, her tribute to the late Bruce Lee, Enter the Dragon! But Shawna saw it coming somewhat. She put up her arms, blocking her face. The kick struck her forearms and sent her through the second rope. She fell outside, close to the announcer’s table.

Matt Baily - “She barely managed to avoid death itself right there, West! Luckily for Shawna, there are no count outs. She is free to collect her breath.”

West Newhaven - “Fantastic improvising from Shawna Martinez here tonight. Her arms are going to be feeling that kick, but better the arms than the face!”

Matt Baily - “Wait, West, here comes Artemis!”

Artemis wastes no time trying to give chase. She runs off the rope, attempting a suicide dive. Shawna was waiting in wake, though.



(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Oh damn! Art-Art's dead.")

The crowd sounds off after witnessing a fatal move. Shawna just smacked Artemis out of midair with a steel chair. Artemis fell to the outside, making an impactful thud against the light padding. Shawna throws the slightly dented chair into the ring and throws Artemis in.

Matt Baily - “Holy cow! That chair shot just about caved Artemis’ head in!”

West Newhaven - “There we go, Matt! Shawna has brought in our first weapon and she is looking to utilize it to its fullest potential. Look at her! She’s waiting for Artemis to get up, instead of going for the pin! She is out for blood!”

As West finishes his statement, Artemis gets up only to receive a brutal chair shot against her skull.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “There's that underhandedness the Turncoat taught her! But Johnny, it's no DQ! Shut up!")

Artemis stumbles back, falling into the rope. She leans on it for support, barely cognitive. She gets off of the rope to receive another chair shot. The collision of flesh and steel echoes throughout the arena. The fans just eat it up, beginning a ghoulish chant.



Shawna looks to do just that. She walks back a few steps, swinging a few test hits. Artemis tries to recover, but she did not expect Shawna to charge in and blast her with a final, gruesome shot. Artemis falls to the mat hard. Her body is limp. Shawna roars out to the fans. They roar back at her as she ditches the chair. Artemis turns over, trying to gain some life into her body, revealing a crucial fact. Blood runs heavily down Artemis’ face.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Jesus! Shawna should go to prison for child abuse!!")

The fans gasp at first, but then ramp up, celebrating the fact.

Shawna grins, but decides that it is time. She drags Artemis up by her bleeding face. Shawna drags her finger across her throat and sets up Artemis in a full nelson.

Matt Baily - “We all know what is coming now.”

Shawna heaves Artemis up into the air, holds her up there for a moment, before dropping her viciously onto her face. The Bella Mafia has connected and left Artemis stiff as board on the canvas. Shawna pulls her close and covers her.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “What, you're not gonna follow through with sawing her head off?!")

Robbins falls to the mat and gets ready to count the inevitable.

Shawna Martinez: 1

Artemis Kaiser: 0

Time Remaining: 19:58

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “That was academic. It was also the ONLY thing Shawna's done in her life that was academic!")

Robbins helps Shawna up and raises her arm. Shawna breaks away from Robbin’s grasp, glaring down at Artemis. Artemis was still limp. Shawna peers about for a moment, wondering if she had knocked Artemis out. Only one way to find out. Shawna fell back down to the mat and went for another pin.

One! – Two! – KICKOUT!

The crowd comes to life as Artemis raises a shoulder. Shawna grins, but motions to Robbins “Two”? She raises up two fingers and then stretches her arms. Right when she does, Artemis leaps up and grabs onto her arm!

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “PEARL HARBOUR!!!")

Matt Baily - “Artemis got her in an armbar!”

Artemis quickly drags Shawna into a cross armbar, taking Shawna by surprise. Shawna tries to scramble out of the hold, but fails to. Artemis is locked on her arm, pulling with unbridled fury. Robbins gets down to see if Shawna wants to give up. Shawna shakes her head “no”, trying to get out of the hold.

West Newhaven - “Artemis said that she was bringing her submissions back. She went to one of her old favorites! Shawna might have to tap to escape this!”

Matt Baily - “Artemis is tied to her arm. She is trying to rip it out of socket.

Shawna manages to get one arm free. She quickly decides to punch her way out of the hold. The first punch does nothing to Artemis who replies with a warcry. Shawna falls back down to the mat, screaming out in pain. She goes back to punching. Eventually, her punching prevails as she breaks the hold. Shawna rolls about on the mat, while Artemis is laid out flat. Shawna shakes her arm, trying to alleviate the pain, but as she gets too close. Artemis jumps up and hooks her legs around Shawna’s waist.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “She's like a barnacle! In more ways than one.")

She pulls Shawna down into a Guillotine choke!

West Newhaven - “Shawna needs to get away from Artemis. Artemis is like a shark on the hunt!”

Matt Baily - “Don’t look now. Shawna might be fading! Will Artemis get her first point now?”

West Newhaven - “Don’t say she’s done yet, Matt! She’s fighting back!”

Shawna, utilizing her raw strength, picks the much smaller Kaiser off the ground.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “The power of steroids, folks!")

She gets a bit of speed on her and drops Artemis down with a spinebuster, effectively breaking the hold!

West Newhaven - “SPINEBUSTER!”

The Impassable succumbs to the choke for a moment as she rests on the mat. When she starts to get up, Artemis is already at it again. She hooks her legs around Shawna’s waist, wraps her arms around her throat, and pulls her down into a Rear Naked choke! The crowd is frantic at Artemis’ tenacity.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “She's done. She should tap now to get Art-Art to remove the hold and reduce injury... but seeing as she's an idiot, she'll try to power out, wasting MORE precious energy.")

Shawna begins to claw at Artemis, trying to rip her way out of this. She manages to get on her feet and rush into the corner, dulling the hold. She then falls back, slamming Artemis hard against the canvas.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “If you've ever wondered what it was like to see a man in drag wrestle a rag doll, well, here ya go.")

Shawna gets away from the deadly submissionist, gagging for air. She looks at the bloodied Artemis in disbelief. Artemis, who is getting to her feet, gazes at Shawna, flashing a bloody smirk.

West Newhaven - “Shawna saw her life flash before her eyes!”

Both ladies are on their feet and begin to trade strikes again. But before Shawna can get any momentum, Artemis shoots at her leg and takes her down into a leg lock!

Matt Baily - “There’s another submission! Artemis tricked her!”

West Newhaven - “That’s why she was our former champion! Channing knew how great she was. Shawna needs to be more vigilant! She might give up a point here by tapping, but she still got about fifteen minutes to go!”

As Artemis wenches on, Shawna begins to muscle her way to the rope. When Artemis catches her, she breaks the hold, drags her back to the center of the ring, and locks in an Ankle Lock! Shawna begins to scream out in pain as Artemis expertly applies the lock.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Just submit, you dope!!!")

Shawna begins to crawl again, causing Artemis to furiously scream out. She roughly slams Shawna’s leg into the mat. Shawna rolls around on the canvas, clutching at her leg. Artemis gives her a quick kick before dropping down her.

West Newhaven - “Look out, Matt! Artemis got her in the mounted position! Shawna got nowhere to go—HOLY CRAP!”

Shawna tries to fight her way out, but Artemis responds with a thunderous elbow to Shawna’s face. Before Shawna could fully recover, Artemis begins to lay in pointed elbows on her enemy’s face. The fans respond with uproarious cheers. They are loving the brutality. Artemis continues the onslaught until Robbins steps in, pulling her away. Artemis gets in Robbins’ face about the matter.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Whaaaat the fuuuuck is Robbins DOING?! NO DQ, GENIUS!!")

Robbins protests, saying that it is too dangerous of a move. Artemis stands silent for a moment, looking to the ground.

Robbins looks to go check in on Shawna, but Artemis shoves him out of the way and gets back to where she was. She proceeds to batter Shawna with more elbows, but she didn’t realize where she was.

CRACK!

Shawna hurls up the chair that was used earlier to the back of Artemis’ skull. Artemis falls off of Shawna, hitting the mat with a lifeless thud. Shawna groggily gets to her feet. Droplets of blood hit the mat as she stands up. The fans come to realize that Shawna was not just bleeding a little. Her whole face was covered in blood!

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “I've never seen two women bleed so much since I accidentally stumbled into the ladies' locker room that one day of the month!")

Her eyes are wide with anger. With a yell, she follows a rising Artemis. She raises her leg and brings it down!

Matt Baily - “Il Impassable! RIGHT ON THE STEEL CHAIR!”

Artemis’ face collides with the steel again. Shawna wipes some blood off of her face before covering the unresponsive Artemis.
Robbins once again counts the obvious.





(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Damn, Shawna's ahead at just over the half-way point! She might just beat the Leprechaun at this rate!")

Matt Baily - “Shawna has taken a commanding lead here, ladies and gentlemen! She might have taken a massive beating in the past five minutes, but she is winning this match defiantly!”

West Newhaven - “This isn’t good! This isn’t good at all!”

Matt Baily - “If the former champ doesn’t clear her head—“

West Newhaven - “Shut up, Matt! She got this! I know she does!”

Shawna goes to Artemis, picking her up. She begins to look for something, but Artemis sparks to life. She breaks Shawna’s hold and goes in for a roundhouse kick. Shawna ducks, but Artemis twirls around and connects with a 360 roundhouse kick! Shawna falls slowly, but definitely. Artemis falls down herself, seeming to lose that same spark.

West Newhaven - “LIGHT’S OUT! LIGHT’S OUT! She is tapping into her family’s arsenal! Shawna’s done! One point for Arty! Pin her, pin her!”

Artemis reaches one arm out and goes to pin Shawna.



The crowd screams out in excitement as Shawna brings up her shoulder. Artemis shows her frustration, both of her hands at her face. She smacks the mat, mustering up some fire in her body.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Someone forgot to take her widdle nap!")

She picks up Shawna with authority and shoves her into the corner. Shawna puts up a guard, which only seems to anger Artemis more. Artemis responds to her guard with a heavy elbow. When it connects, Shawna’s guard drops. Artemis roars and opens up a mixed barrage of strikes onto Shawna.

First, some elbows, rocking Shawna side to side. Next, Artemis goes with some rapid chops. Then, she kicks Shawna ruthlessly. And finally, Artemis caps off her lethal bombardment with a high knee to the face. Shawna crumbles in the corner. Artemis steps away for a moment, before following up her combo with a running face wash.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “I never thought Shawna's grill could get any more fucked up, but Legolas seems to be trying to up the ante!")

Shawna falls out of the corner and Artemis drags her in for the pin.



Artemis furiously stands up, kicking the bottom rope. She walks over to Robbins who already knows to back away. “That had to be three!” Artemis screams at Robbins, pushing him into the corner. Robbins puts up his hands and shrugs. “It was definitely two!” he replies. Shawna begins to muster up to her feet, using the ropes as her support. When Artemis starts to turn around, Shawna charges in, trying to take out Artemis with a Yakuza Kick. But she gets caught with Enter the Dragon! Artemis falls onto Shawna. Robbins falls down to the mat.





(Johnny Bonecrusher - “The Canadian Pygmy's gonna need to even things up in the, oh, say, next five minutes, I'd say, in order to still have a chance in this!")

West Newhaven - “Ah, yes! Arty got her first point. She is still in this!”

Matt Baily - “Yes, but for how long? Both women are losing a good number of blood! They both have to survive ten more minutes of this onslaught!”

West Newhaven - “You best believe Arty Kaiser will survive this!”

Matt Baily - “I rest assured that if Shawna is the one that has to survive. She is in the lead. As a matter of fact, I say that she can do more than survive. She can cap this all off and end this all!”

The brawling starts again. Strikes go back and forth between the two combatants. No one is getting the upper hand. Shawna takes a page out of Artemis’ book however and connects with a mean gut punch. Artemis stumbles into her grip and Shawna lifts her up.

Matt Baily - “Here we go! National Anthem!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “National Anthem?! Didn't that occur BEFORE the show started?")

West Newhaven - “Look at the strength!”

Shawna removes one hand away, hoisting Artemis up with only one arm. She parades around the ring, before dropping Artemis down hard on the mat. She isn’t finished, though. She picks up Artemis again and hits her with another one armed National Anthem. When she tries to go for it again, Artemis slips behind her and holds her in a rear waist lock. Shawna easily breaks the tired hold and goes behind her. When she throws Artemis back, attempting a German Suplex, Artemis lands on her feet!

Matt Baily - “Backflip!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Well of COURSE! When you don't even weight a pound, gravity works differently for you.")

Artemis goes for a German Suplex herself, but Shawna impressively hits a backflip herself. Once again, she goes for a German Suplex, but Artemis lands again. But when Artemis lands, Shawna turns around and blasts Artemis with a massive lariat! Artemis is turned inside out! Shawna goes the pin.



Shawna snaps up in disbelief. She thought that she took Artemis’ head off, but the little warrior was still fighting. Shawna picks her up, giving a few punches to the face. She hits a spinebuster on Artemis, following up with a pin.



Once again, Shawna brings Artemis to her feet, trying to connect with an Olympic slam, but Artemis slips over her barely. Shawna turns around to a dropkick. Artemis hits the ground roughly, trying to muster up some energy. After gaining some, Artemis attempts to kip up, but Shawna is on watch. Right when Artemis “kips”, Shawna traps her legs and hurls her up. Shawna brings Artemis back down with a thunderous powerbomb. She goes back for another pin.



Matt Baily - “How is Artemis still kicking out?!”

West Newhaven - “Both of these ladies are just defiant tonight!”

Time to switch tactics. Shawna goes to hook Artemis’ arm, who fights back, but it was not enough. Before long, Artemis found herself caught in a crossface! She begins to wrench the hold, causing Artemis to scream out in agony. Robbins drops down to ask if she wants to submit. “NEVER!” Artemis screams out, Shawna continues to pull back, stretching Artemis like an accordion.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Both these women are stubborn. They should be tapping out as quickly as they can, taking the loss, and regrouping ASAP! The Johnny knows ALL about when to hold and when to, FOLD! GET it? No, but seriously...")

Artemis does not give up. Artemis begins to try to fight her way out. She couldn’t move her arms nor her legs.

Shawna suddenly broke the hold, rolling off of Artemis. She was flailing her hand back and forth, screaming inexplicit words to herself.

West Newhaven - “Artemis bit her! HAHAHAHA!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Okay, that's hilarious.")

The Impassable glares at a standing Artemis who wipes her mouth. Shawna stands up and immediately smacks Artemis across her face. Artemis turns and spits blood into Shawna’s face, disorienting her.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Stay classy, Canada!")

The crowd hisses in discontent. Artemis drags Shawna between her legs, picks her up, and drops her down with a DMD! Artemis quickly covers Shawna!



Artemis falls over, exasperated by Shawna’s resilience. Instead of going back on the attack, she opts to go to the top rope. As she rests up there, she awaits Shawna to get to her feet. When Shawna is about to, Artemis leaps off, but Shawna is waiting for her with a spear! The crowd sparks to life as Artemis is planted. Shawna quickly pulls Artemis up and gives her a Bella Mafia for her troubles. She hooks her leg, awaiting the count.



The crowd is at its loudest peak as Artemis rolls herself out of the ring. Shawna gets up, perplexed.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “'How she get out of it? Me no know!' That's what Shawna's saying right now, verbatim.")

She exits the ring, standing on the side adjacent to where Artemis is. She takes a moment to breathe, collecting her thoughts on what to do. She turns to the ring apron, looking for another weapon. She begins to drag out a table. The fans cheer in anticipation of what she is going to do. However, when Shawna stands back up, she turns to see Artemis running up the steel steps. Artemis leaps off and strikes Shawna down with a Falcon Punch! Artemis barrels past Shawna, hitting the padding hard.

“THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME! THIS IS AWESOME!”

Artemis is the first to get on her feet, throwing her opponent into the ring. She attempts to cover Shawna, but isn’t able to get the best position. Shawna’s shoulders are down, though. Robbins falls to the mat.



Shawna strongly kicks out, causing Artemis to fall near lifeless to the mat. Shawna gets up quickly, noticing Artemis’ lifeless form. She runs off the rope, waiting for Artemis to get up. Shawna rushes in, attempting an Il Impassable, but Artemis catches Shawna’s leg. Artemis smirks and drags Shawna by her leg towards the ropes. She then exits the ring, standing on the apron. With a jump, Artemis whips Shawna’s leg on the rope, causing Shawna to fall to the ground, screaming.

Artemis slides back in and locks in a classic move, the Canadian Cloverleaf! Shawna near instantly tries to struggle out, but Artemis brings down her weight.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Fun fact about this particular hold: IT'S JUST A FUCKING TEXAS CLOVERLEAF!!!")

Shawna begins to yell out, clawing for the rope. Artemis wrenches the hold back as far as she can. Shawna’s fingers tickle the bottom rope, but she isn’t able to get a clean grasp on it. Robbins shakes his head “no”. Shawna buries her face into the mat and taps out!



(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Wow. Called it! No, wait, I said she should have done this about five minutes ago. She's done. I think. Yeah, no, she's done. Probably.")

Artemis continues to wrench the hold, but Robbins pries her off. Artemis pushes Robbins into the corner, screaming at him. He informs her that it is his job. Shawna begins to get to her feet, but Artemis runs in with a kick to her gut. Shawna hits the mat again, but decides to slide under the rope. Artemis tries to catch her, but Shawna picks up a chair, causing Artemis to back away. Shawna gets back in the ring, holding the chair. Artemis retrieves the chair that Shawna battered her with earlier.

The crowd knows what is next. Both women go in trying to smash each other, only to strike each other’s’ chairs. They both suffer the recoil, but go back in. And again. And again.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “It's like a light-saber battle, only shittier!")

Shawna gets a stronger hit in causing Artemis to release the chair. Shawna makes her pay for it by slamming her over the head with the chair. Artemis hits the mat brutally, staining the mat even further with her blood. Shawna continues to brutalize Artemis with the chair until Robbins takes the chair away from her. Shawna is not fazed by the action, because she has a clean opportunity to hit another Il Impassable. Artemis’ face hits the mat hard. Shawna pins her victim, grinning widely.

One! – Two! – THREE!

Shawna Martinez: 3

Artemis Kaiser: 2

Time Remaining: 2:16

Shawna drags Artemis’ limp body outside of the ring towards the ring announcer table. She motions for the commentary team to move, glaring down at Jezzabel. Jezzabel merely smirks and gets out of her way.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “You're LUCKY I told her to keep her hands off you during this match, or you'd have been dead, dead, DEAD!")

West Newhaven - “She is looking to end this all right in front of the number one contender!”

Shawna clears the table, taking Artemis on top of it. Artemis didn’t move as Shawna lifted her up. She held Artemis there, enjoying what was about to come. After a few seconds, Shawna brought Artemis through the table with a Bella Mafia! The table blew apart.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “EC-DUB! EC-DUB! EC-DUB! Oops, wrong company.")

Shawna took a hit from it, but recovered quickly. Artemis’s body was still limp, showing no signs of moving. Shawna threw her into the ring and follows in. Shawna laid down for the cover.



Shawna’s eyes widened as Artemis brought her shoulder up. She looked down at Artemis, shaking her head “no”. She got up, shaking her head still. She picked up the chair, waiting for Artemis to rise up like she have been doing this entire match. Smacking against the mat, she looks back at the clock. A minute remaining.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “You're intentionally taking the easy way out, you, you, I don't even KNOW anymore!")

She blew out a breath and waited for Artemis to get up. Fifty seconds remaining. Artemis began to stand, her body barely able to at this point. A vacant look was in her eyes, as opposed to Shawna’s cold and dangerous ones. Forty seconds remaining.

Shawna charges in, about to strike. Forty five seconds remaining. As Shawna brings down the chair, Artemis’ body sparks to life if only for a second. She brings her leg up and connects with Enter the Dragon!

West Newhaven - “ENTER THE DRAGON! ENTER THE DRAGON! If Bruce Lee is watching this, he must be the proudest angel in Heaven!”

The chair launches up in Shawna’s face, causing her to stumble to the ground. Thirty seconds remaining. Artemis falls backward on top of Shawna, probably not out of her own free will.

Matt Baily - “Here is the pin!”





(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Hooooo, hohohohohoHO!!! THAT'S cutting it REAL short!")

Both women are still unmoving after the occurrence. The crowd did not stop cheering. Robbins looked around, confused on what to do. Luckily for him, the clock was at nine seconds. As the clock draws near its end, Shawna puts an arm over Artemis. Robbins drops down quickly, counting the pin. Four seconds remaining!

“ONE!”

West Newhaven - “NO!”

“TWO!”

West Newhaven - “NO!”

“THREE!”

West Newhaven - “SON OF A BITCH!”

A sudden noise could be heard as Newhaven flings his headset off.

Matt Baily - “SHE DID IT, SHE DID IT!”



The buzzer sounds off as the clock hits zero. Robbins calls for the bell. Shawna begins to crawl to her feet, using the ropes.

DING! DING! DING!

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “God damn, she did it, she fuckin' did it.")

Brenden Reynalds - “Here is your winner and NEW RWD WOMEN’S CHAMPION, SHAWNA MARTINEZ!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “There ya go!")

The sound of a headset returning to its place picked up.

West Newhaven - “NO! NO! NO! NO! DAMN IT! DAMN IT! DAMN IT!”

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “What, was he GETTING some from Art-Art or something? What's HIS problem?")

Robbins is handed the belt. He walks over to Shawna who gazes at the belt. A tired grin comes upon her face. She looks over her shoulder, seeing Jezzabel locking eyes with her.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “That's RIGHT, Con-a! I TOLD you what would be waiting for you if you won, and yet, you STILL gave it your all and won! That's too too bad...")

Shawna takes hold of the championship and raises it up. Jezzabel smirks and scoffs. She looks as if she was about to approach, but Bonecrusher steps in the way. He shakes his head “no”. Jezzabel looks at her manager and decides to walk off. As Jezzabel and JBC leave camera view, Shawna raises her belt again.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “Thank your lucky STARS I'm a good guy, otherwise you wouldn't have made it out of the arena ALIVE!")

Matt Baily - “What an ending to this spectacular match! I don’t think Shawna knew her arm was over Artemis. I think it was a gut reaction.”

West Newhaven - “It was a lucky reaction if you ask me! Artemis used all of her last energy to get that point! Jezzabel should have ripped Shawna to shreds!”

Matt Baily - “Now, now, Artemis put up a valiant fight, but Shawna was the better woman here tonight!”

As Shawna celebrates the best way her battered body can, fireworks blast and confetti begins to fall. The crowd begins to chant.

"SHAWNA! SHAWNA! SHAWNA!"

Shawna puts the belt around her waist, and then looks at the barely awake Artemis. Artemis manages to get on her knees. She peers up at Shawna and at the final score.

West Newhaven - “The poor girl doesn’t know what is going on.”

Artemis soon processes it and covers her face with her hands. She bows down to the mat, in clear anguish. Shawna walks up to Artemis. The crowd is silent. She lowers down to Artemis’ level. She looks around the girl, before standing back. She tucks a strand of bloodstained hair behind her ear.

West Newhaven - “Get out of there, Artemis. You’re still in the ring with a girl that wants to—WHAT?”

Much to everyone’s surprise, Shawna picks up Artemis…gently. She cradles the Young Empress, who actually fell out again. The crowd begins to clap at the sight of such courtesy.

(Johnny Bonecrusher - “What a show of sportsmanship! These two TRULY gained the other's respect this night! This was a well-fought war that's now come to an end. The winning side: Shawna Martinez, your NEW RWD Women's Champion! ...Until she faces Jezzabel and gets her natural ass BEAT, son!!! This has been your friend and mine Johnny Bonecrusher, hoping you all enjoyed MY take on this wild ride that was Shawna Martinez versus Artemis Kaiser. Be sure to catch out FUTURE commentaries from Yours Truly, such as the independent release of Professional Wrestling in the Pacific Coast: 1998-2008! Starfleet OUT."))

Robbins follows Shawna, making sure that Artemis is okay. He is seen calling the infirmary, telling them to prep a room. He rushes ahead of Shawna, trying to get as prepared as he can. Shawna turns to the crowd one more time, flashes a smile, and heads on to the back. The show then fades to black.